ZikaZikaBoomBoom~: February 2009

Been feeling very emo lately, there are so many things to think and ponder, this song is jus something that is on my mind most of the time...

รู้ไหมว่าใจสั่น อย่าทำให้หวั่นไหว
หากที่จริง เราเป็นแค่เพื่อนกัน
ทุกครั้งที่มองตา ต้องเกิดคำถาม อยู่ทุกวัน
ว่าเธอคิดเช่นไร

อึดอัดนะ เข้าใจไหม ที่ต้องยืน
อยู่กึ่งกลางระหว่างเพื่อนกับแฟน

นี่ฉันต้องรักเธอแบบไหน
ช่วยบอกกันมาได้ไหม
แล้วฉันต้องทำยังไง เมื่ออยู่ใกล้เธอ
ที่ฉันคิดๆ มันผิดไหม
ที่แอบมีเธออยู่ในใจเสมอ แค่อยากรู้

ถ้าเธอแค่ลังเล ก็อย่าจับมือฉัน
หากว่าเธอนั้นยังไม่มั่นใจ
ถึงเป็นเหมือนเพื่อนสนิท
ก็อย่ามาทำให้ฉันคิดไกล
ด้วยการใกล้ชิดกัน

อึดอัดนะ เข้าใจไหม ที่ต้องยืน
อยู่กึ่งกลางระหว่างเพื่อนกับแฟน

นี่ฉันต้องรักเธอแบบไหน
ช่วยบอกกันมาได้ไหม
แล้วฉันต้องทำยังไง เมื่ออยู่ใกล้เธอ
ที่ฉันคิดๆ มันผิดไหม
ที่แอบมีเธออยู่ในใจเสมอ แค่อยากรู้

หากคบเป็นเพียงเพื่อนกัน
บอกเลยว่าเพื่อนอย่างฉันมันรักเธอ
ยังอยากเป็นคนเดิม คนนั้นที่ยืนข้างเธอ
จะไม่ทำตัวให้เธอลำบากใจ แค่นั้น

นี่ฉันต้องรักเธอแบบไหน
ช่วยบอกกันมาได้ไหม
แล้วฉันต้องทำยังไง เมื่ออยู่ใกล้เธอ
ที่ฉันคิดๆ มันผิดไหม
ที่แอบมีเธออยู่ในใจเสมอ แค่อยากรู้

บอกได้ไหม...

*********************

---Translation---

please dont cause my heart to yearn for you
when in reality, we are just friends
when i look into ur eyes, there's always that question...
what are u thinking about us?

do you know that it is torturing, to be
standing between feeling of friendship and love

so how should i like you?
can you please tell me?
what should i do when u are nearby...
whatever that i'm thinking, is it wrong?
for always secretly having you in my heart
i want to know...

if you are still hesitating, dont hold my hands
coz you are totally uncertain
even though we are like a gd friend
dont make me imagine our feelings,
by touching my heart...

do you know that it is torturing, to be
standing between feeling of friendship and love

so how should i like you?
can you please tell me?
what should i do when u are nearby...
whatever that i'm thinking, is it wrong?
for always secretly having you in my heart
i want to know...

if we are still being friends
i want to say that your this friend still loves you
i want to be your same friend, who stand beside you
i wont do anything to make you uncomfortable, at all

so how should i love you?
can you please tell me?
what should i do when u are nearby...
whatever that i'm thinking, is it wrong?
for always secretly having you in my heart
i want to know...

can you just tell me???

*******

Sunday, February 15, 2009 1:11 AM
STORM the KBOX!!!

RAWR~!! it's screaming time babies!
lol, we did start off with screaming and shrieking and of course, pole + slutty dancing. cant b help rite?! firstly, we gt the biggest room with the screen projector and pool table, seatd for 10+ppl...it was OMG OoO a total eye opener of wat kbox is like! wuahahahha, and of we go! aditya sang some slut songs...all those, britney, fergie, pussy cat, tata young etc. i shaked till i almost drop onto the floor panting lah! but it was fun! staying there until 6+ and omg, i no more voice liao...

the two most often had-to-be singers coz they do knows lot of bitchy songs and i was the backgrd dancer -.- anw, i tried doing ballroom slow dance with aditya...felt like vomiting...hahahaha, realli cant do it with ppl other than my darling(s)! also did pole with Wilson...my hair did stand up! brrr~...btw, pole dancing realli make my back ache ToT

went eat dinner at foodcourt...i totally forgt to sms anton! i jus realise when i recieve the sms from A when i reached home saying A is going sleep!!! omg, what had i done?!?! tmr must really clear things out (by finding excusessss) :p

anw, after that was shopping time and we went in like almost evry shop...but the most time-takers are the furniture shop opp the sony and that sony shop, also fourskin...-.- blame it on aditya... =.= at the furniture shop rite, evryone was walking ard sperately and i was like admiring things that are too ex to be bought :) and they really had to observe evry single things from clock to carpet to vase to chair...haiz...i realli scared we break something...coz evrything there cost more than $100 lah T^T
then the sony shop was kinda stupid..5 of us went in, walk one whole big round and the sale ppl were like hunting us like hawks behind and in the end...window shopping onli lor...i swore i did saw them murmuring towards us lah >< and i asked the price of the TV, $799...vry tempting leh
then we went to fourskin..there...evryone except me was like trying on evry caps or hats they have and they look seriously like some...uncivilise ppl lah. aditya gt caught blink blink with one hat so i was like "buy lah buy lah, 32 bucks onli...nw discount u know" we were there for at least 20 min and in the end...nobody buy anything, so we jus stood there blk ppl path. lolz

model-suppose-to-be but wilson photo taking skill realli sux and it turned out like the above -.- zzz and there were hell lot ppl ard lah...hu dare to retake?!

Sat 196 home....my mom called me on the way and i was like telling her say i m going home! But however, when reaching my house stop there....the convo on the bus was realli INTERESTING. im nt gonna mention what it is but wel...i purposely went to bedok Mac and sat there to chat with Wil and Adit for 1+ hour...gosh...realli laughed my gut out today. frm the kbox to Mac chitchat...it was the best valentine ever! hu say valentine must spend time with lovers onli? friends are important too!!! hi5~! luv u guysssssssssssssssssssss!

gd night! gonna drop dead on my bed!

1:01 AM
Cedar part 2

picture of aditya acting cute at the ball smacking game lolx! and vicents joined in the game and oops! he missed untill very...i dunno wat to say Xp

after that very tired+ hot+ bored, so all willing to take cap to marina sq...and duh...i hav to cam-whore my shopping stuffs!

reach there kinda too early lah...so went bowling first and woo~! thanks to wilson for taking the pic of me. nice post babie~!!! ( but i feel like my ass damn big nia...)

anw, the two balloons are for us! ( anyone with me) the rose was jus a witness of our love ^^ hahahah, i gib u, HONEY(s) //////-//////
lolx

12:44 AM
Cedar gal Part 1

heeheehee, happy yappy Valentine! as alot ppl would hav already know, cedar gal organised carnival on this Sat and of coz, i wont miss carnival! i do hope VS would organise something like this too, not some formal events onli, it's boring~! anw, aditya and i was like planning to sit on that train/car lah, then i asked my fren how much and she said abt 5 bucks...omg...forget it...i'll rather buy drinks ah!

then we believed that we kena scammed for the fried icecream -.- $3 for one tiny scoop of icecream in a fired flour -.- hu came up with this idea sia

above here was the girl seling the fried ice cream, it was seriously...tiring...dont cha think so too?

below here is a water ball thingy, cant rmb what is it exactly called as, i wanted to try!!! but but but...will it sink?? T^T
so all in all, nth much lah, Wilson Aditya and i could onli manage to stay there till12+ before we were bored out and decided to leave the place. dint realli do many things, jus buy some food, bought two heart balloons for Anton and me (then i lost it ltr during shopping =.= now left one, damn!) oh oh oh oh! and i gt a rose coz i won aditya during the ball scooping game and my points were hight enough for me to earn one FAKE rose!!!! -.- WOW.....

btw, before i left the house, i jus realised that i plugged the phone to charger but nv on the switch! damn! so my batt was like 10% before i leaving the house?! so i asked Wil and Adit to go first, i sat taxi there ltr alone!
before that i looked at the doghnut i bought last night and they were looking like...love triangle?!??! sooo hit into the middle of my heart....

12:36 AM
SLI pictures

umm...this is suppose to b the last photo but nvm! it's the congregation of all the student organisation that created this whole SLI event. singing a song cal...umm...call what ah? cant rmb. lolx

THAT was Sean Chin when he receiving his pin!

talks by Mr Oh and Mr Low...*yawn* but interesting!

meet our school very own professionals! gentlemen! sportmen! 3 in each of them! ( i think)

Saturday, February 14, 2009 12:45 AM
3 hearts...

My love triangle. Im the white. A is pink n I is black.

12:37 AM
The organising commity

12:26 AM
Mr jonathan oh

I recognise him since sec1! He's hot!

12:25 AM
It's sean!

12:21 AM
Roses of you n me

3 roses, exclude the dying ones, rep i luv you

12:21 AM
Happy valentine~!

The light pink is me, the white is u. Me blooming for us n u starting to bloom. The highest rep our luv result tat wil rise like tat dark pink rose. As othe withering roses, they rep the fading bad memories for us to start tgt again. I think im seriously in luv wif u..

Friday, February 13, 2009 11:49 PM
14/02/2009

it's Valentine's Day~!
alot of ppl must hav been looking forward to this day, but to me it jus a normal ordinary day that i still hang out with my friends. no one to spend time in this special moment with rite...last year...i think i had somebody, yah, i rmb...it was M. lolx. this year abit lousy, coz i nv realli try to find and i jus keep talking to one person, it has been two weeks + hah. and im nt sick or bored of u yet..yay~! tat's a gd news! i dont know how long u gonna take, but wel...i guess i'll jus hav to wait patiently for the right time, it may b six months, one year, or more...i dunno...i jus hav to make the best out of evryday! rite? and why nt having sidedish along the way? hu knows...may b these sidedish are realli my true luv... XP

ytd PE was very fun and tiring after the long weeks of stupid activities! handball! first time playing and seriously...i sux...perhaps i ve been thinking alot of things lately. gosh..u are realli affecting my evrything! cant live a moment without thinking of wat to do and wat i shouldnt do. when i shouted dont let Rahmat has the ball~! and you were the first person who intensely blocking rahmat away from the ball. i saw ur face...u were protective, and that...made my heart even more trembling. it been a few days, i cant take it anymore. so i sms you during bio...let us nt talk or acknowledge each other at all for the next week, i need time to adjust to this unrealistic hope. it jus seem too impossible. you are my friend and i dont want to lose a friend i realli care. when someone whacked the ball against ur leg i was realli felt like running towards you and help to ease ur pain. but my sense stopped me, i should stay away from you. it's for the good of both of us. me, to be homoganous with my existing luv. you, to not wonder into this disgusting path. i do hope u understand me...i realli hope. dont hate me, i jus need sometime

again..happy VALENTINE to both A and I
you two are my current heart affair Xp
hav a nice day evryone!!! woo~!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009 4:37 PM
11/02/2009

wee~! i LUV my papi and mommi! u know why??? coz of $o$
no lah! of course nt! i recieve MORE than jus that from them lah
for example..their love is so uncountable!
nobody is going to love me like they do, it took me till like last year to realise the love and care i hav been taking for granted for years...
anw, ytd and monday afternoon was so fun traveling singapore!
Monday after school went to sentosa, play LUGE for my third time hehheh...went to merlion for the first time! and then ate at some ulu steamboat restaurat that the waitress were damn pissy! i jus asked them for more sauce at evry table and they were ngiaoly saying that two bowls of sauces are enough! why u still need more?! it's like...HELLO~ we are the customer and u are suppose to serve us NOT questioning us. if it was nt because the adults were looking i would hav made some bitch face to her lah...zzz.zzz

watched the super sian song of the sea (my 4th time!)
then went back to hotel half dead...
it was Elizabeth hotel ard orchard behind Mt Elizabeth hotel
anw, my cousins wanted to try singapore delicacies...so i had to bring them to newton circus food centre there to had super heavy SUPPER!
gosh..i solo ate the friend oyster, then still gt fishball soup, satay, mee goreng, grill chicken, damn full lah...had to sit bus bac one stop coz all lazy walk
however, i shouldnt hav mentioned abt sex shop, the house of condom. my cousins were like oh gt sex shop ah!? let's go let's go!! so i brough them walked alllll the way from far east to lucky plaza. we (including me, i tot to get in the first time) were so happy to see ppl coming out lah, ran towards the shop BUT...they came from the next door 7/11 =.=
and the shop was closed...all so sad, onli my cousin-in-law were so happy that her husband wont get some exotic sex toy home! hahahaha

ytd was jurong bird park an then shopping at some perfume shop ard Amoy street. i gt the first perfume of my life! yesh~! luv my mom. btw, before that we were having lunch at seoul garden, during the meal, my dad was like asking if i gt money with me. DUHly, i said not a single cent (blink blink) and then he said, nah...including hong bao...u know how much?!?!? OMG i dont wanna say Xp

heehee, shopping at orchard lor after that, i nv buy a thing, my mom gt a bag and my dad was so lazy to shop and jus followed us around...i dont shop first lah...wait they fly back first

OMG it's raining!! go closed windows and on air-con XP
.
.
.
.
done!

should i write some emo stuff?? may b i should...

so...after evryone left sgp..i was alone as ever
reached home after see doctor for MC
i wanted to cry badly, howver, i ushed myself to bath first then i slacked in my room. i realli need a listening ear...but...who will it be?
A or I?
i was struggling for like 10 min before i called I so i could ask abt the homework too before he sleep, and also...in case i talk with A till very long :P
so i called I and aked him abt hw. tat was jus a mask of mine lah actually, i tried to talk longer, to lengthen the convo. but I was VERY busy -.- typing ferociously that i could hear the keyboard sound. talked talked talked, the more we talked...the further apart i felt. i had to control it u know, but it's so hard...i wanted to say the magic words...but...the consrquences frightened me. i must forget....tat is the onli right choice to do...

A was as sweet as ever...i cant stop smiling talking to A...it was jus too, brilliant? but i realli hoped A would talk more lah, i know u gt sorethroat, and i understood. but next time must talk more k!
coz i talked for 1 hour i'll get sorethroat too lor Xp
miss ya~!

tat all for ytd...pic i'll try to get bah, my mom brought the cam back thailand, haiz...i go do A math le

Saturday, February 7, 2009 11:41 PM
flag day pics~!

10:33 PM
07/02/2009

so close yet so far...
have you ever heard of that phrase?
today i realli felt it
i know i shouldnt be saying this but, i jus cant keep it...it's too much for me to handle.
it all began since last year, there was this period that i realise, 'u' made my heart droofing and today, my heart was sooo excited throughout the whole day! i was going crazy. u sms me in the morning how to go to that Mac in tp, then we met and went to tp tgt. that was kind of my FIRST chance of traveling ard with you. you were so slpy, i felt like smacking ur head and pinched your cheeks. when i thought of it, i blushed, and obviously, u werent suppose to be noticing anything ///-/// it was jus...my own little dreamy world of wishes tat will nv come true.

i quickly told angus who i wanted to partner with and 'u' are my partner as expected. we were like the first enthu kia who went for the donation. i dont know why, but timed seemed to fly so fast. there was nv once that i had this kind of moment to spend with u two persons, to know more of you and most importantly, to find out the truth. u were different. totaly diff from the school. it was nice partnering with you and and ....and....i dunno? i was in love? gosh...
it was more obvious, when we went to cinema, sitting beside u was so uncomfortable. i had to always control and maintain my pose so to make sure that we still remain at a distance. it was extremely hard. i was realli hoping that...something like a lover could hav done. tsk. stupid isnt it? i dint want to stay away frm you. u are like a magnet that i kept attracting to. when we walked, side by side. when we ate, side by side. and you know what? what u did to me in the lift was really making me dumbfounded...how was i suppose to react?! when u jus... on me and i was seriously blushing like tomato lah. nobody ever suspected my feeling for you, it was all seemed to b like a joke, but i do hope it happens. anw, why did i even bother followed you home in the first place? i could hav jus stayed on at tp there and enjoy my day. i jus wanted to accompany u as long as possible. it's wrong, i know. i wont even stand a chance.

nvm, jus take it as a stupid lamenting of mine k. i shouldnt be saying this. it's gonna make matter worse. i should jus shut up. and one more thing...i already hav someone. i cant effort to like another one hu seem to be like a dream to me. it's nv gonna come true. i know it, i jus know it. i dont want that kian cong incident to repeat itself u know. tat was damn idiotic of me.

zzzzz. shut up!

now i alreadt hav someone in mind and THAT person will nt change! i will maintain it. i do feel it that it is going to turn out great! i'm sorry for me yabbling rubbish today k...
may b it's true after all...
'close distance win true love'?

Thursday, February 5, 2009 9:42 PM
05/02/2009

as alot ppl would hav already know...
i gt PANGED! =o=
yeshh...my phone is gone, my C905! i jus bought it like in Dec and now...it's resting in peace in Chia's office. gosh, realli, i shouldnt hav look at ur photo during class. now i cant even look at it eva again...

i hope i realli gonna get it back by next week, thanks to Mr Pang that i gt it back slightly earlier, he's nt so bad after all lah, dont b so negative on him hor. ^^

anw, today went to change the braces color..and i picked RED! woo~! HOT. thanks to anton for introing it to me...i nv try it before anw. but now my teeth damn hurt sia...dont even feel like eating dinner.

after the teeth thing i went into the amo super market in tanglin to hunt for groceries. and i realli gt thingsss -o- and wta important the most was that....i was totally *blink blink* upon glancing at the roses. i felt as if something was calling out for me to buy them...so i bought XP 6 pinks and 2 pinkish white. NICE. i read the horoscope and realised that i should place flower at the north of my room to boost my LOVE energy. =.= dont know if it true but i like having flower in my room! do it doesnt hurt trying rite?? (jus cost 10 bucks+ onli)

so..this is how my room look like. what cha think? cute huh?

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 10:55 PM
Im sorry.

Can u forgive me? Lets talk things out k. Miss ya!

Monday, February 2, 2009 10:52 PM
02/02/2009

gosh...my ass, oops! i mean my thighs pain...
ouch ouch ouch
thanks to Niche, she brought me go shopping at orchard on this tiring Monday! actually, i jus wanted to skip that SLI rehersal...who want to go lah..boring~
so jus fake fake and went off...heehee ^.^

threw my bag at home and my first destination was parkway parade : i need to buy the sunflower seeds for my cousin's hamsters...argh!!!i want one too but i wont hav time or mood to tc them lor. anw, the seeds were out of stock...i think some sluts must hav coped evry single package..evil..ltr my(cousin's) hamsters die ah...i'll do voodoo on them -.- tsk!

then off i went to orchard takashimaya!!
kinokuniya, as ever.
haiz...i hate books, coz i dont hav time to read (english books)
then we went down to buy chocolates, she gt chocolates for her friends (15 bucks each...rich bitch XP) and seriously, i was kinda upset lah...she didnt seem wanting to get anything for me.

then we strolled ard at Wisma Atria untill abt 6.30...conclusion...she gt shoes, 3 books, two jackets from cotton on, two boxes of chocolate and one box of brownie....and i gt her file to bring back to mandarin garden =.= zzz she went back to her thomsom home....haiz...i was kind of tired on Mrt that i took a wrong one at raffle place and went untill clementi...omg...i was thinking abt the person on my phone walpaper lah...////-/////

so fun chatting with you...i realli hope...that's it gonna be a positive outcome. so long le that i nv feel this way...since last May when i knew 'somebody'? im currently jian fei for you babie!
night!

Sunday, February 1, 2009 10:55 PM
01/02/2009

woohoo~! today baked cookies! it's my second try u know...but...it turned out abit worse than expected (cant say why) jus that...the cookies are abit ...*gulp* but still can eat lah! not too bad!!! *clap clap clap clap*

anw, lunch was at thaipan and it cost onli 50 bucks! very little u know..actually i should hav ask them go some ex restaurant lah...pangseh me ytd T^T i'm still hurt by it lor. but wel...we reali did patched up today (so i'm nt that strong hearted after all~ =.=). it all started when i asked jane to help mop my room while i mixing the flour. and yeah...evryone kind of like gathering in the kitchen and help bit by bit. however, the thing they helped most were like...tasting?! -.- i should hav put poison inside lah. see them suffer...wuahahahaha *v*

suan le lah...i also cant make myself angry with them for long
they are like my evrything in singapore anw
^^

kkk continue continue.....
this afternoon was a totally lazy buster period...i sat down in front PC from 2+ til 6...wat i did? CHAT...yeah...CHAT. it's been long time since i chatted this long with anyone. should i say who? nvm. we still did sms after that when i was attacking my chinese homework. couldnt concentrate much...worse still my cousin came back and we watched Fantastic4...zzz...it took me two hours to complete 7 MCQs and one open ended question of my chem WB...blame it on U and the TV.
but i liked it though....

however...how long is it gonna be like this?
u arent ready to commit and i'm urging evry now and then.
to tell the truth, i dont want to search ard anymore...
may b i can jus wait for the time...when u are ready
(but may b sidedishes along the way)
but i'm scared u hav a change of heart and that does happen very often. umm...let fate decide bah.
DOA
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